Spiritual Work Is Hard

Karma came back to bite me

Like a mosquito bite on the arm

It stings, itches and bothers throughout the day

Karma reminds me I still have work to do

Things still need clearing

And they must be processed through

I acknowledge I am not perfect, not one bit!

But I do my best

Then leave the rest to Him

Spiritual work is hard

Especially when you want it most

Peace, silence…

Trust in the universe

So don’t give up hope

You’ve still got a long way to go


If you are reading this, just know that it gets better! Don’t lose hope. Spiritual work may be hard sometimes, especially if you are interested in enlightenment, but it will all make sense one day. Take this from someone who’s dealt with a lot of struggle and pain. My faith in God has saved me, restored me and reminded me of who I truly am. We are all here on Earth to learn and grow. So be kind to yourself and keep doing the next right thing.


Hello, karma

Anyone else believe in karma? I do and well, it seems like I am dealing with a lot of karma right now. I like to think of karma as a “what goes around comes around” or “you get what you give” kinda thing. For example, let’s say you had a previous job where arriving late wasn’t that big of a deal. Then, you begin a new job and you continue that same pattern. Before you know it, you get fired! Now I’d call that karma. And I can especially relate to that example because it happened to me.

The funny thing about it is that I have seen many of my coworkers get fired before, and I assumed I was different, lucky even! But boy was I wrong! To be honest, looking back on my life before I established my faith in God feels like it was a totally different person. Of course, I’m still the same me, same soul and everything. But before I discovered God, I was terribly depressed, overworked and just generally stressed. But all of that occurring in my life was so essential to where I am now. I can’t dismiss any of that. It was all part of the lesson.

Whenever I sense my personal karma making an appearance again, I just take it as it is. I don’t try to complain about it to somebody or make the situation worse for myself. I just let it occur. In fact, I try to hold it in a state of grace. Holding it in a state of grace means that I let whatever situation that is bothering me to be held by a greater force than my individual self. I sense that there is a higher order in this life, and I respect that. I respect that eventually we will all get what we deserve by what we put out into the universe, and what kind of influence we consciously or unconsciously put onto others. So I don’t go out and let my silly ego have a say on it, instead, I have learned to hand it over to God.

Handing over all troubles to God means I have finally chosen to stop letting myself go crazy over something. I recognize that whatever issue I am facing will eventually, in God’s time, pass. “This too shall pass” as is commonly said. And when that karma passes, I’ve discovered that the truth eventually shines through. When I see the Truth shining through, it is a very humbling and joyous feeling.

How many times have you been in a situation where you could finally see where a person was coming from? Letting karma pass through by holding it in a state of grace is kind of like that. It is like finally understanding what a person went through after you’ve been judgmental and angry towards them. For example, when I entered my first relationship, I had no idea how to be! I was about 18 years old when it began, and I was terribly shy for the majority of my life. Beginning this relationship with him only magnified it. A lot of the time, I didn’t know what to say or do to make the relationship blossom. Him, on the other hand, was the exact opposite of me. He was happy, sociable and comfortable in his own skin. I, too, shared similar traits, but I grew aware that he was much more evolved and mature than me, so to speak. While he was active in playing sports, I had social media to entertain me. While he already had a successful previous relationship, I had none. In fact, it seemed he grew up in a much more loving atmosphere than I, which I believe played a factor too in our relationship. Add all of this up, and I felt quite inadequate.

Because of this feeling of inadequacy, I slowly grew to hate him. At the same time, I loved him as well. It was all very confusing for me. Why do we eventually begin to hate the person we loved? That was a question that puzzled me for a long time during and after the relationship.

The only answer that I’ve seemed to find is that it all boils down to the projections we make. What exactly is a projection? I’ve come to learn of projection as when we place blame or attack on others, when it is really ourselves we must take responsibility for.

For example, when I get angry at someone for something they said, I soon recognize I am projecting. Why do I recognize this is so? Because I have come to learn that everything that I experience, comes from my very own thoughts! I’ve come to recognize how powerful our thoughts are because, believe it or not, we are always communicating something whether we like it or not.

Sometimes we don’t have to do or say anything for other people to get what we’re about. And that is something that goes beyond words or just saying it. It’s something we experience on an intuitive, subjective level.

Anyways, this is most of what I have learned so far. To anyone who reads this, maybe it’ll help you out. I know it helped me. Thanks for reading.